Rule of Fumb 39: Stripey Snakes

Each year, stripey snakes claim more lives than car wrecks and handguns combined. Here's a tip to keep you this side of the bloody grass.

Outtakes: An adorable little twat monkey deliberately steps on me bloody lines

Also, lady producer wanted — daft cows need not apply.

Nature Is About To Get Very Bloody

This fall, a new sort of nature programme is coming to your television. A programme that will bring you nature in all her bloody glory. Presented by the only geezer at BBC with the bottle for it. This fall, Bloody Nature is coming. Watch it if you ain’t a ponce.

Snake Identification: A Slippery Business

There's over ten million species of snakes. But there's only one good kind.

Snake Handling Basics: How to Perform a Pikey's Centrifuge

Dale demonstrates proper technique for Pikey's Centrifuge, a useful method for handling both venomous and nonvenomous snakes.

Surprised by the Jungle's Most Remorseless Killer

In addition to being the jungle's strongest beast, the Lowland Gorilla is also among its biggest c--ts.

Happiness is a warm boot — covered in blood!

Why a good boot is your most important piece of jungle kit.

I nearly get done by a bloody hangman's moccasin

Or why a wise c--t always packs fresh knickers.

Near topped, before almost getting merked

The baboon's fist tarantula is 100 times more venomous than the black widow. The amazon mayhem viper is 100 times more venomous than the baboon's fist tarantula. Here's me encounter with both.